Home from work today. Not feeling too good. Going through a job transition, and thought I would give Dad a call. He's always provided me with advice when times get tough and has been especially helpful when it comes to career questions.
Dad worked for Lorain Products/Marconi/Emerson (a telecommunications company) for 30 years. He started on an assembly line and retired in middle management. So he's seen it all, and done it all! He's not shy about telling stories that reveal his faults and at the same time he's happy to regal you with his tales of victory over tyrannical bosses and his steps up the corporate ladder. He worked hard for his company.
Through my own working years, I've appreciated his advice.
Back to my phone call. It didn't turn out how I'd hoped. First, I think I woke the poor guy up from a nap, although he tried to tell me he was doing a puzzle:
"Oh, hi Lisa. I'm just exercising my exercise. It's good for your brains." From that I surmised he was talking about the puzzle.
"Dad, what kind of puzzle is it?"
"Oh, you just take all these numbers and they don't go through the gates. It's hard to do. 1,000 puckles!"
"That sounds hard. Is it a lighthouse puzzle?" (Linda or Heather told me this.)
"Oh, what do ya call it? What do ya call it? ..."
"I think it's a lighthouse, Dad."
After this exchange, I thought career issues would be too confusing. But he did end with a clear statement: "I counted and I have five more lighthouses. I'll be glad when I get it done!"
We then talked -- in chunks -- about Mary Jane's upcoming birthday, about him cutting back on a certain medication, about his visit with my Uncle Bob and Aunt Mary from Florida, and about how he feels okay and how glad he is to have Linda. He's good. He gets up every morning at 6 a.m. and still does his exercises.
But this conversation was another step in what I call "shifting reality." This is tough stuff. After 30+ years, I realize that my Dad will probably not be the person I'll go to for advice anymore. Maybe this will change! But for now, Dad and I will talk about other things. I'll dig in my mind's archives to use all the advice he's given me in the past. Mainly I'll just follow the example he's set.
At the end of our chat, I told Dad he sounded good and I was glad he was doing well.
"Oh, I think I should be better, but Linda says I'm doing really good."
Clear as a bell.
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Hope you're feeling better today. We've got that too, Owen's home today. As always, you've got the right attitude to draw on the past advice and appreciate your Dad for the talks you can still have. Thank you for the insight on what it's really like. Keep going.
ReplyDeleteVery good and honest post. I miss the advice from my mom. I liked your analogy about pulling it out of the archives. I guess I can do that to.
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